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Hilarious

Remember those early Facebook days, when you passed around those viral “25 Things You Never Knew About Me” notes, and tagged all your friends to do the same? I was browsing my timeline and came across my own. It’s pretty funny to read now!

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1. I hate talking on the phone and never answer it… unless it’s my dad, and that’s only because he calls continuously until he makes sure I’m not in jail. (Still true, though I’ve improved slightly and now my dad calls just to make sure I’m alive. The threat of prison seems to have passed.)

2. Junior year of high school, I won a writing scholarship to spend a summer at Oxford University and had the time of my life. Oh yeah, and I learned a lot too. (In hindsight, I’d say this experience was a turning point in my life for more than one reason…)

3. When I was born, the doctors were convinced I had Down Syndrome.

4. I moved 12 times before I turned 18.

5. One time my hair was dyed black and white, like a zebra, and it was really… not funny.

6. I’ve hung out in the White House and the Playboy Mansion, and NOT as a tourist. I feel like not many people can say that.

7. I’ve never been to a wedding… but that’s about to change!!! (Oh boy, did it change!)

8. I am published poet. I wrote a book too, but that’s not published yet… 

9. I was home schooled for 8 years. 

10. I get frustrated by the fact that I still don’t really know what I want to do with my life. (Still true, though I have garnered more clues.)

11. I got to see Colin Firth while interning at Parliament in London, and trust me ladies, he’s not that cute in person and he is a terrible speaker.

12. I’ll try almost anything once, but I’m really scared of heights, spiders, and mushrooms.

13. I was once awarded a sports trophy. See, I AM athletic!!! (Ha, it was for swimming!)

14. At one point I had: a cat (obvi), a dog, a fish, a horse, 2 parakeets, and an ant farm. The fish died within 24 hours, the horse died in 6 months, the ants died, and the 2 parakeets flew away.

14. I have over 10,000 photos on my computer and am proud to have captured so many moments.. (They’re all on an external hard drive now. They were killing my computer.)

15. I really hate being exclusive or judgmental, and I try really hard not to be myself. Big kids used to be mean to me so I started the L.I.E. Club (Let’s Include Everyone Club…lol) and I still try to live by those tenants. (I think I’m much worse at this now. At least in terms of being judgmental. I still make sure never to leave anyone out.)

13. I believe dinosaurs still exist. (Chuck thinks I’m a moron.)

16. I survived a 7.6 earthquake and it was actually really fun.

17. My biggest insecurities are my skin and my ribs… and my diaphragm. 

18. I had major jaw surgery in high school because my orthodontist effed up. 6 weeks of liquid diet = not so fun, so of course, I cheated 🙂

18. One time, a guy approached me in the middle of the night with a gun, and I’m alive to tell the tale! Ask about the hat that saved my life…

19. As a former ballerina, I’ve been in the Nutcracker countless times, but I never actually saw it til this past December… and it was amazing.

20. I was in a band once. And we have a CD.

21. The first time I decided to try drinking, I got caught. Then I became an RA. (And let my residents drink. I probably couldn’t add that on Facebook at the time of this original post.)

22. My favorite color is not actually pink… it’s red! Also, I hate shopping. I’m not as girly as you all thought, huh? 🙂

23. I Lysol spray and Febreze my bed, put lotion on my eyelashes, and spritz myself with Victoria’s Secret Love Spell body splash every day. (I have since ditched the Lysol spray, and switched the Love Spell for Secret Charm, but yes, I’m still OCD about these things.) 

24. I went to an all girls high school and lived in an all girls dorm freshman and sophomore year of college, before living in apartments with all girls. Maybe this is why I’ve never had a real boyfriend? (Awww!)

25. Secretly, I want to be a Pussycat Doll when I grow up. Or a Bond Girl. Okay, okay, maybe not so secretly… (Embarrassing. Now I’d say a “Dancing With the Stars” professional would be more ideal.)

Chuck and I have created a new theory about Annie’s mysterious, pre-adoption past. Any time she’s outside, she looks very nervously at the sky, and lays low to the ground. We have determined that she must have been kidnapped (catnapped?) by an eagle or a falcon but somehow escaped its hungry talons, far from home. She was subsequently picked up by the animal shelter, where I was lucky enough to find her.

Clearly there’s just no other feasible explanation.

I think the military has made Chuck a better person. He is so strong, and confident, and successful. On the other hand, I think the military experience has made me a worse person, for myself and for him.

“Worse” isn’t quite the right word, but maybe you know what I mean? Less comfortable with myself. Less whole. More frustrated and lost, clingy and dependent. Something like that.

This has nothing to do with Chuck himself, of course – it’s just the reality of military life. That’s my negative moment for the (hopefully) forseeable future! It will pass… They always do.

There’s only one thing to be done with white hair: dress up as Daenerys Targaryen for #Halloween! Annie will be my baby dragon! Now all I need are actual plans for Halloween…

… minor detail.

Back to bleached blonde, since people in Georgia can’t handle highlights any better than they could in North Carolina. Time to buy some purple shampoo!!

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Heaven or Hell?

There appears to be some controversy over whether or not the Pope said atheists can still go to Heaven after they die. My guess is that he made some merciful and constructive statement about atheists that got twisted into something entirely different… but regardless, it hits upon one of my biggest unsettled doubts about my faith: Heaven and Hell.

I can grasp that those who choose not to believe a certain creed will not reap the benefits and promises of that creed. For instance, an atheist can’t expect to get into the Heaven as described in the Bible. He can’t expect to achieve nirvana/Paradise/what have you without accepting what the creed has to say. That just wouldn’t make sense. What’s the point, if everyone can get in (especially without faith?)

What I cannot grasp, however, is that those who choose not to accept a certain creed (perhaps in favor of another) will go to Hell. In fact, it’s really, really hard for me to grasp Hell at all.

There are many ways Christianity has been interpreted over the years, but the biggest message I get from it is a loving, merciful God who views us as His (imperfect) children and wants us to succeed in achieving everlasting life. As for humanity, in many ways I am very cynical about it, but I also feel that very few people are truly evil. And those very few evil people are the ones who “deserve” Hell.

As for the rest of us in between…? I just can’t accept it!

I can’t accept that the majority of my friends, family, respected colleagues – who are not atheists, but are not “born again” Christians either – are going to Hell. I am blessed to know so many wonderful, overall good people (we are all flawed), but I can’t accept that my God would send them to Hell.

I know what the Bible says on the issue. I know the countless ways it has been interpreted. I know there is no one alive on Earth who can tell us what it all really means. I know that most people in the world have faith in something, just in different forms. We are all doing the best we can with what we’ve got, and reacting to what Life teaches us. In some ways all of our stories are the same, and in others, they are drastically different.

But it’s one of those confusing, complicated, and depressing subjects that I probably will never figure out. I like to think that perhaps “accepting Jesus” is living a Christ-like life. Many world views teach a very similar message to Christ’s, and I think most “Heaven-deserving” people are trying to lead that good life, at least as much as Christians are (if not more so, in quite a few cases.)

I don’t want to be one of those Christians who misses the entire point of my faith to mesh with my own wishful thinking, but I am also far too humanistic to believe it’s quite that cut and dry…  Are so few of us really getting in? Or, are so many of us really getting in just because we “believe” in Jesus?

Is it okay to just say “I don’t know?”

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It’s been a less than stellar day…

… So I just cancelled the healthy dinner I had planned in favor of my fave Kraft Mac n’ Cheese w/ hotdogs.

I slept fitfully all night, locked myself out of the house this morning, missed my yoga class, dealt with a busy commissary full of particularly irritating people, and didn’t get anything else on my productive to-do list done because I felt too unwell (thanks to certain feminine ailments that I will spare you the details of here.)

Here’s to a better day tomorrow. Bring it on, Yellow 5!