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This Job Renews My Hope…

… in my ability to possibly be a working mom someday. Not that I like to think about having babies at this point, but as a married woman approaching 30, it does need to be thought about. And when I was on the Big 4 career path back in DC, I seriously thought there was no way in hell I could ever be a working mom. I worked on a team that was mostly women, and the team leaders were all mom’s. Honestly – their lives sounded miserable to me! Big 4 workloads are notoriously challenging. To be considered for advancement, it is REQUIRED to work large amounts of overtime. Other people and lots of money are at stake with everything you do or don’t do.

I felt the stress (and the guilt) when my bosses had to leave work suddenly – usually in the middle of something big – to tend to a child with an ear infection. I felt their fatigue when they had to hurry home in time for dinner, then sign back on to log more hours from 8pm till close to midnight. I shuddered when I heard stories of one leader sending emails on her Blackberry while en route to the hospital to deliver her baby. I remember thinking, “No way do I even WANT to try and balance early motherhood and career.” I didn’t want to run the risk of half-assing either of them. It was discouraging, because like many woman, of course I want both, and recognize the value in both…

But that brings me to this job. It seems that not every career path is like a Big 4 career path. It’s pretty amazing to be in a work environment where all hell won’t break loose if I need to leave for a few hours. Or take off early if I need to watch my kid perform in some school show. Everything is so much more… reasonable. There are very few crazy hours or asinine requirements. The mom’s and dad’s alike here have a good balance of work and family. Even though I sometimes pull funny hours here and there for an event, there is tons of flexibility to make up for it by taking off early or coming in late at some other point during the week.

It makes me wonder, if we do end up back in DC (which we probably will), if I even want to return to a job like the one I had before – children or no. The paycheck was nice. The recognition was nice. But even as a single, childless person, it was hard to justify the pressures I felt. It’s even harder now, knowing it doesn’t have to be that way!

I guess we’ll have to see what my options are when we move. And of course, I don’t have kids yet. But I don’t see the point in jumping back into that kind of job for just a few years, before facing those issues all over again. I know I don’t want to balance babies and multi-million dollar contracts…

We shall see!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!! 2012 sure was one heck of a year, filled with highs and lows, joys and woes, and everything in between. I feel silly saying lows and woes, because I really am such a blessed girl. It’s been more a year of adjustments, and I’d say we wrapped it up considerably more adjusted than I anticipated.

I am just so happy Chuck and I had a full year (minus one month) to live and grow together in NC. I found a job, some friends, and now have a niche to call my own before Chuck leaves for the better part of 2013. For that much, I am endlessly grateful.

With the exception of coming down with a nasty cold to shake things up, my holiday break was delightful. Plenty of old friends, generous gifts, lively parties, comfort food, and even a pretty snow shower. We got home last night and I must say that despite the good times back home, I am LOVING being back in my own bed, and not living out of a suitcase. It’s nice to be back at work too 🙂 Despite my constant sinus headaches and stuffy nose, 2013 is off to a fabulous start!

I don’t typically do much to celebrate my birthday, but this year it was really special. Chuck was gone for my actual bday, so my girl friends in the area took me out for dinner and drinks at an adorable French restaurant downtown called Caprice Bistro. It was delicious and so much fun. Then my co-workers surprised me at “staff meeting” with tiramisu cake and sweet (but embarrassing) fanfare. Then Chuck came home, a gift in and of itself. We drove home to NoVA, and he took me to the Washington Ballet’s Nutcracker and gave me some beautiful diamond earrings. 28 may not be so bad 🙂

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You Can Tell I’m From DC When…

… I make an unpatriotic ass of myself here in the South.

I was doing some last minute Christmas shopping at the Cotton Exchange downtown last night, when another young professional-looking girl stopped me to ask for some advice on her White Elephant/Secret Santa gift. She had a number of paper weights in front of her and couldn’t decide which to get.

I pointed at the red, white, and blue frog that said “Proud to be an American” on it, and without even thinking, said “Well I wouldn’t get that one.”

“Why?” she asked.

Just as I said something along the lines of “Someone may get offended,” I realized how ridiculous I sounded. “Oh…” she said, clearly dumbfounded, and slightly offended herself. “I would never think of that. You think so? I don’t think so.”

“I’m from DC,” I said defensively. “We’re overly PC up there…Sorry…You’re right.”

I was so embarrassed and scuttled away. Definite heartless Yankee moment. I’m disturbed that I’m actually that brainwashed!

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What Love is Like for Me

My sister is such a good writer. She’s always been able to capture emotions and put them into words so eloquently. She wrote this about love and marriage, and it could not be more true for the way I felt in marrying Chuck:

“The moment I began to dream of the possibility of marrying you I was struck by the gentleness with which this hope swirled and enveloped me with courage and joy. I do not fear the commitment and obstacles as I always have, but feel devoted to facing the wonder and challenges that a life partnership entails. I still marvel at this realization. It is not fireworks, a thunderclap, or a lightning bolt. It’s peace. It’s a serene quiet that comes with the knowing that your heart has met its compliment and softly whispers, ‘Yes. Devote yourself to him forever.’ “

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General Updates

I am officially half way through Chuck’s month-long training escapade – woohoo! It’s flown by and I feel a little guilty admitting I’ve barely noticed. I think I may be keeping almost as busy as he is. In reality though, I think I’m just in that be-strong-and-focused mode. Full gears ahead….

I am REALLY loving my new job. I love how it gets me out in the community, and how I’m learning to provide services to area businesses. The girl I’m replacing officially left yesterday, so as of Monday, I’m “in charge”.  I really want to do well there. The Chamber has been so nice to take me on even though I won’t be around long, and I want to make sure I make it as awesome for them as they have made it for me.

I’m ready to move into my new office on Monday. I already have a bag full of silly decorations in tow! I realized I haven’t had my own “space” at work in years. We did hoteling at PwC… a different cubicle every day.

When I’m not busy at work or staying late/arriving early for events, I’m prepping for weekend activities. Weekends are generally the hardest to be alone, and when I miss Chuck the most. Last weekend I attended the Commanding General’s holiday reception on base, courtesy of an invite via the Chamber. It was so nice! I watched a football game with friends (gasp!) and got lots of Christmas shopping and cleaning done.

This weekend I hosted a lunch for the ladies attached to the men in Chuck’s unit. I always stress myself out taking these things on, but they are generally worth it in the end. I’m glad we had an opportunity to get to know each other a little better.

I’m about to head to dinner at “Bemily’s” (Ben + Emily) and tomorrow I’m hoping I’ll be motivated enough to get up and go to church. We’ll see… 😉

Last night we had an impromptu candlelit steak dinner with tomato caprese and red wine. Godiva chocolate bars for dessert. I feel like we should have used our nice china! But like I said – it was truly impromptu. The mood was killed when Chuck made me watch Mission Impossible 4 right afterwards anyway 😉

It’s Chuck’s last weekend before he leaves for 29 Palms for a month, for pre-deployment training. At least I get him for Thanksgiving Day – and he will be back just time for Christmas!

I’m actually so ready to get this deployment on the road! The limbo stage is annoying. I think both of us are ready…

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First Day!

Today is my first at the new Chamber job, since yesterday I had to drive 2.5 hours northeast to attend my mandatory court hearing for that speeding ticket I got Labor Day weekend (DA reduced it for me with no points and no classes! Still had to pay out the wazoo though, 95% of which was in court fees – stupid government bureaucracy…!)

Anyway… the girl I’m replacing is still here technically, so there isn’t a ton for me to do yet. I did get to go to a ribbon cutting ceremony though. And attend meetings! More importantly, I’m filling out my tax and direct deposit forms so that I can actually make some money too 😉

I’m starting to feel like a real professional again! 

I wonder how the poor Bean is doing at home though… all alone, all day long? The president here at the Chamber brings her old poodle with her to work every day, so I wonder if I can arrange some sort of similar deal with Annie?! Wouldn’t that be fun!! Miss her 😦